stir fry noodles with cabbage and shrimp

Posted: November 23, 2013 in pasta
Tags: , , , , , , ,

I sat next to a middle aged white man on the plane yesterday who excitedly started talking to the Korean boy sitting next to him and I found out that his son was in Korea, meeting his Korean fiance’s family. As I listened to him talk abut how excited he was that his son was getting married to someone he found so great, and sharing everything he knew about Korean culture – from the wedding ceremony to the Korean dry cleaners he had recently befriended – I thought about my own interracial and intercultural impending marriage. I commended the father for being so vocally welcoming of his son’s Korean bride and told him that whether he knows it or not, he is helping their marriage by sharing how he, too, celebrates her culture and is happy about the two of them coming together. He responded that it was because he was a Christian and to him, it didn’t matter what someone looked like. I think he missed, though, that I wasn’t just commending him for not being racist -for not thinking that there was anything wrong with his son’s interracial relationship – but for his trying to navigate that it’s an intercultural one as well by learning about her culture, too.

At this point, Jimmy and I have known each other for so long and he is my best friend, so it’s easy to forget that he’s different from me, that he comes from a different culture from me, until it comes up. Usually it’s because of something innocuous, such as when I comfortably eat with my right knee up and against the table, but sometimes they’re existential decisions, such as whether or not I’ll lose my identity if we don’t end up raising our future family in the Catholic Church? In those moments, I am grateful to our parents, who must see those differences more explicitly than we do, but either pretend that they don’t see them in their efforts to  not make either of us feel uncomfortable, or celebrate them with us in their own way. In a funny way, it’s to me another act of parental love and generosity when they accept their son or daughter in law just because their child loves them, too.

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chopped cabbage
1 lb uncooked shrimp
1/2 cup chicken stock
1 chopped onion
egg noodles

Saute chopped onion and cabbage. Cook egg noodles in chicken stock then mix them both together.


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